Top 8 Tips For Finding Love – Elite Matchmakers Secret
Elite Connections has been in the dating and matchmaking industry for nearly three decades and this top matchmaking agency knows the secrets to successful relationships. Most singles don’t generally go as far as to hire matchmakers to solve their quest for love. However, the professionals at Elite Connections can give genuine, expert advice that can help turn anyone’s luck around in the dating game.
Sherri Murphy is a Co-Founder and CEO of Elite Connection, a celebrated matchmaking firm located in Southern California, New York, Las Vegas, Florida, Paris, and other major cities worldwide. Having spent around 28 years successfully pairing people off, Sherri has gained quite a bit of insight into what helps clients find the right person for them—and what the rest of us are likely doing wrong in our own searches.
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Below, Sherri shares the top 8 tips for finding love – things we can all do to improve our game and increase our chances, with or without professional help.
1. No More Passive Swiping – Have An Aim!
A lot of clients resort to matchmaking agencies because they get tired of swiping left and right on the numerous dating apps. Singles are spending too much time swiping only to find out that they were lied to about what someone looked like or who they were. Getting scammed on the internet has become more common than ever before. Now, it feels like singles must do extended research and background checks on a person by themselves. This can be very time-consuming and tiring! Since it feels like online dating can be too much work, people tend to lower their standards. It is important to set dating goals and keep them even when it can get discouraging.
Most people still believe that love will find them when they least expect it or when they stop looking. That could have been possible in the past, long before the internet. Nowadays, the internet can make dating overwhelming with the number of dating apps and singles readily available. Keep your standards high and make sure you do your due diligence before meeting with someone from the internet.
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2. Step Out Of the Routine
Most people are comfortable in their daily routines. They go to the same coffee shops, restaurants, and bars and do nearly the same things every day. While there is nothing wrong with having a set pattern, it limits the chances of interacting with a new set of people. Singles getting out of their comfort zones will put them in a position to meet people they wouldn’t normally meet. People today have become overly reliant on dating apps, which aren’t as dependable to fix your dating life for the better.
Set aside some time for new people and new experiences. Singles need to try a new activity, learn a new hobby, go to a new bar, or put themselves in a position to meet new people. If they go to the same places with the same people, they will get the same results. People wanting an ideal partner to find them have to position themselves to be found.
3. Be Open-Minded – Set Aside the Ideal Love Story
It is common to have an ideal soulmate and perfect ever after planned out in someone’s mind. But professional matchmakers believe that people who are too caught up on a perfect checklist often find the journey of love to be the toughest. Pew analysis found that forty-two percent of people found love outside their ideal type in a consensus conducted in 2018. Having high standards for someone’s characteristics and qualities is perfectly fine. Attraction is an important factor, however, having a compatible personality and lifestyle is a major key to finding a significant other.
Ultimately, the job of an Elite dating service is to focus on the important qualities of what their clients really want, beyond physical attributes. In search of the perfect match, singles often overlook amazing people that are right in front of them. Focusing only on looks is never a good idea for those who want something stable and long-term. Finding someone who looks perfect doesn’t mean there will be a perfect connection. Therefore, it is better to have an open mind, have conversations with people, and see if there is room for attraction to grow.
4. Self-Reflection First
It’s great to know what someone wants in a partner, but it is equally important to assess themselves and make sure they are emotionally available to date. A crucial question that most people unintentionally ignore is, “Do I personally live up to the expectations that I have for someone else? And more often than not, the answer is a big No!
It is important for someone to have their own accomplishments and something they can be proud of on their own. If people are unsatisfied with themselves and their life, finding love will not give them the happiness they are looking for. Think of it this way, if someone doesn’t love themselves, how do they expect someone else to love them? Our advice on this issue is to take time to work on yourself before diving into the dating world.
5. Look for Someone Who Can Be Emotionally Aligned.
Having physical attraction is one thing, but having emotional compatibility is what makes or breaks a relationship. When people are not on the same emotional wavelength, overcoming the differences can become overwhelming, and the survival of the relationship becomes questionable. Many people don’t think much about anything else besides looks and sexual chemistry. At the same time, emotional, financial, and spiritual compatibility are elements that any relationship thrives on.
Professional matchmakers suggest paying attention and asking important questions before the relationship becomes serious. Singles looking for a serious relationship should try to look for people who are more emotionally compatible. For example, in terms of how they communicate their feelings and what their love languages are. Opposite attracts can be a good thing for certain aspects of a relationship, however, we do not recommend that when it comes to emotions.
6. Don’t Fall Head Over Heels On The First Date.
The key is to be patient and calm. Take it from the pros that diving into a relationship head first is not a great idea. People can like each other a lot after a first date, but they need to take their time to get to know each other. See if they have compatible personalities and can fit into each other’s lifestyle.
Sometimes, the hormonal rush and the excitement of meeting a potentially new partner can make people forget that building a new and genuine relationship requires time. Love has its own timeline and, when rushed, can be perceived as unnatural and disingenuous. When someone takes their time, they can come across as confident and relaxed, which can make them much more attractive to a prospective partner. Stop speeding through the important steps, there is all the time in the world when it comes to dating.
7. Learn To Be A Better Date
Show up to dates being open-minded, staying positive, dressing to impress, and having good etiquette are important to master in the quest for love. Often people who have been rejected or had their hearts broken subconsciously surround themselves with a defense mechanism on dates. Enjoy each date and use it as an opportunity to meet new and exciting people.
Likewise, people who think very highly of themselves can come off as intimidating, rude, and cocky on a date. It is important that singles present themselves well and don’t be too over the top or too serious. Communication skills, body language, and overall energy should come from a place of positivity and should make the other person feel welcome and appreciated.
8. Instincts – That Gut Feeling
One of the most meaningful tips for finding love is trusting that gut instinct, especially when it comes to safety. If something feels off, then it probably means it is not the right fit. It’s advised to take a step back and look from a wider lens. Dating gives people the opportunity to see what they like and don’t like about certain qualities in a partner. This doesn’t necessarily mean that there is a problem with the other person, it’s just reaffirming what someone subconsciously is feeling.
In other cases, instinct can translate to someone’s comfort zone. Dating can bring up past issues that can cause overthinking and projecting. For example, a person did not go on a date because they are scared to be ghosted again. Blaming gut instinct will result in missing dates with someone that could be a potentially great match. Learning from these past experiences will teach someone how to follow their real instincts.
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