Dating Advice

Five Reasons Why Men Fall in Love

By Tiffney Thirlwell
  1. For one, men’s and women’s brains are hardwired differently, so the first rule of thumb is: don’t try to change him. What I mean by that is not giving up all hope that he will take your wardrobe advice or learn to take out the trash without you asking him to, but on a deeper level, men can not change the way they think, communicate or interpret your communication. Therefore, for peaceful relations with a man, learn how to talk to him to get what you want. If you don’t know where to start, there are many books out there to help you understand his brain and how what you say (or how you say it) may be impeding on the results of your goal. Here’s a hint: Effective communication is all in the delivery.
  2. Be nice. If a man’s been around long enough, he knows that a bitch at 25 is a shrew at 50. So nix the drama, be complimentary, upbeat and supportive, and you will have that man’s heart for life. Men want the furthest thing from a nagging, nit-picking, unappreciative B-I-T…you get the picture.
  3. Prettify yourself. Sorry, ladies. The one thing we can’t argue is that men are visual creatures. Enough evidence supports this fact, so take it as such. For the most part, men appreciate a woman who takes care of her body. What this says to a man is confidence, which equals sexy, which equals his innate drive to constantly want to impress you and also compete to keep himself in shape as well. Men love to compete, so even if it’s with you or for you, it will keep his interest for a long time. This in turn, keeps him on his toes in case other suitors are vying for your attention, and if a man feels like he has healthy competition, his interest in you will be much less likely to wane.
  4. Men do marry their mothers…to a certain odd extent. Studies show that if you’re too much “mom” and too little a “stranger” that triggers a biological nerve that warns against procreation with you due to familial similarities. If you’re too much of a stranger and have very little of “mom”, you’ll be too alien to him and therefore no close connection will be made. But if you’re a little like mom and still a little foreign, it’s just the right balance to create a familiar, comfortable and close connection. A lot of this is simply biology and you can’t do too much about this one, but the good news is, if the romantic connection is made, it wouldn’t hurt to understand and take on the positive traits that his mother implemented in his life that made him close to her. Characteristics such as nurturing, caring, compassion, an open ear and a feminine presence are comforting to a man’s psyche.
  5. Personality (yes, personality) is the winner for the long haul. Yes, men are visual and appreciate outer beauty, but if you’re a buxom blonde bombshell or a Brazilian brunette babe and have the self-righteous, entitled attitude of a stuck up snob, you’ll be next week’s belt notch and that’s about as far as your expiration date will take you. Respectable men love, love, LOVE a positive, easy going woman with virtue, manners, a kind heart who can just relax sometimes. If you show him trust, admiration and appreciation with whatever he gives or does for you, he will take it another step further on his own and treat you like a princess…without you expecting (or complaining about) it.

Drilling a Man With Questions

by Elite Connections matchmaker Rosemary Packard

It Is Wonderful to Take an Interest in a Man However No One Wants to Be Drilled As if They Are on a Job Interview. Personal Questions Such As “Why Did You Get Divorced,” “How Many Women Have You Been out With Since Your Break-Up”, “Do You Like Your Job?”, “What Do You Think of the Stock Market, How Are Your Stocks Doing,” “Do You Own a Home”, Are a Major Turn-Off and an Invasion of His Personal Space. It Is Important to Take an Interest and Ask Non-Threatening Questions Such As “Where Did You Grow up”. “Have You Seen Any Good Movies Lately”? “Do You Play Golf?”

A man wants to feel like he is with a feminine, playful, and fun lady. A woman who is stiff, uptight, and uses closed body language will not be appealing.

Women Being Serious and Business Like
A man wants to feel like he is with a feminine, playful, and fun lady. A woman who is stiff, uptight, and uses closed body language will not be appealing. Interacting in a serious and business like manner will only make your date feel like he is out with “one of the guys.” It is most important to be flirty, relaxed, and open with body language. After-all your date has probably been in his business mode all day and does not want to talk business.

Talking About Health Problems
There are women who think that sharing all their health problems with a man will “bond” them. This is the farthest from the truth. Making statements such as “I just had surgery and am in pain”, or “I was in a car accident 2 weeks ago.,” or “I just got back from the doctor and he told me I have a serious eye problem” will make a man feel like he is out with an senior citizen. Leave this kind of talk to your girlfriends. Bring up positive points about yourself and talk about hobbies, interests, movies, and travel.

Why Men Leave

By Elite Connections Matchmaker Keri Roberts

Anyone who’s been single and dating for any time at all knows that connecting is full of short-circuits.

Take the example of a recent match-up in which a pair meets for coffee and end up in his car necking and groveling like two high school students.

Playing hard-to-get is a thing of the past and the wrong thing to do with men!

It went from hot and heavy with sparks flying to stone cold and going nowhere fast.

Women don’t give men enough encouragement, says matchmaking veteran Keri Roberts, of their interest or lack thereof. Some women feel that to be feminine they need to wait for the man to call.

But the message we, as matchmakers, want to get across to women, says Roberts, is that men need a “green light” in order to call and not risk being rejected. So if the woman is interested in someone she has a first date with, she needs to convey her interest–non-verbally and/or verbally–during the date so the man knows she’d love to hear from and see him again. Playing hard-to-get is a thing of the past and the wrong thing to do with men!

The other mistake women often make is giving mixed messages. She seems engaged, interested and even makes physical contact with him when she is not actually interested in him at all. That’s what you call a big tease, and it’s a no-no for women to lead a guy on.

It’s common courtesy for a woman to call and thank a man for the date and nice time together. However, some men find it tough to tell the difference between a woman who’s genuinely interested in him and one who is simply being polite..

So whether left in a voicemail or connecting by phone to say so, she should let him know–very clearly and succinctly–that she didn’t feel a special connection but wishes him all the best on his quest.