Dating Tips

The fabulous matchmaking duo has worked together for over twelve years. Their experience and listening skills has given them a wealth of information that you need to hear. They will go about the business of sharing this information with those interested on a monthly basis. You can also ask their advice in their online dating column.

We have gleaned the information from young, never married singles and all ages of those back on the market again. The comments and complaints will be shared here. Please listen. 

Top 10 Dating Tips for Women  
by Sherri Murphy & Keri Roberts   

1. When arranging to get together for the first time, focus on when you ARE available without going into the details of your schedule and how busy you are. It's a myth that men like women who are unavailable. Let him know what days or evenings you're free as opposed to those you already have booked. Ex: Tues. and Friday evening look good…

2. If you're meeting at a restaurant, give him a choice of places with different atmospheres and price ranges that you would equally enjoy. The one he picks will give you insight about him and where he's most comfortable.

3. Dress appropriately and to impress, taking time to freshen up hair and make-up and slightly modify your look from daytime to nighttime, if you're going straight from the office. I have a client who keeps a few essential pieces like a pretty camisole or basic black skirt in her car at all times.

4. Avoid sensitive topics of conversation like old boyfriends, ex-husbands and anything of an overtly private nature. Keep the conversation politically correct and uncontroversial, at least on the first couple of dates.

5. If you're drinking, know your limit and never over-do it. Nothing turns a man off faster than a woman who gets a little tipsy or sloppy, especially on the first date. Unless, that is, his intentions are of the one-night-stand variety.

6. Call him the next day, and thank him for the evening, regardless of whether or not you're interested in him. It's just a matter of common courtesy. If you like him, make reference to some aspect of the date that you particularly enjoyed. If you're not interested, keep it short and sweet and leave it on his machine.

7. If you're not interested, and he asks if you'd like to get together again, BE HONEST. Tell him you don't think YOU'RE a good match for him. Most men won't press the issue, but if he does and asks you why, just say it's "feminine intuition." How can he argue with that?

8. After a few dates out with a man who consistently foots the bill, suggest the next date is your treat or offer to make dinner for him. If the night continues beyond dinner to another place for coffee or desert, there's a perfect opportunity for you to spring for the tab. Reciprocation, even in the smallest ways, scores major points with men! I recently had a client tell me he took a gal out for an expensive sushi dinner to the tune of $120, and she didn't even offer to pick up lattes at Starbucks afterward! Big points against her!

9. Be polite and call to say thank you for dinner the next day. But if a man doesn't follow-up within a few days of a first date, it's probably safe to assume he's not terribly interested. Unlike women, men rarely play "hard to get". Quite the contrary, they usually go after what they want with a vengeance. If he calls a week or two later, and doesn't acknowledge the lapse in time, you might as well forget him. He's got other priorities and so should you!

10. Take time getting to know a man, before you get to know him "in the biblical sense." Good things and good men are well worth waiting for! Too much too soon will compromise his respect for you, and if you kiss respect goodbye, you might as well kiss him goodbye!